Waiting for him to take the lead? Why bother when you can learn how to ask a guy on a date? Ladies, this is the new age, and you can do anything he can do.
Waiting for a guy to ask you out not only requires patience, but it is also ridiculously frustrating. Wondering when he will finally do it, how he will, and how much longer you have to wait is not something you should have to put up with. Which is why you need to know how to ask a guy on a date!
Don’t sit around and wait for him to make the first move when you are just as capable of asking him out. I know, it can be intimidating to put yourself out there, but taking the lead shows confidence. If you’ve never asked a guy out before you may need a few helpful hints, but you’ll be golden in no time.
Why should you ask him out?
Guys may have the reputation of being bold and badass, but they are also known to drop the ball on occasion. If you’ve been flirting up a storm for weeks and he still has yet to nail down plans, take control of the situation.
This is your dating life too. You should not have to wait around for him to work up the courage, especially when you already have it.
How to ask a guy on a date
Before actually asking him on a date, understand this is not a guy’s job. Also tradition may say it is up to the man to take the lead, especially when it comes to dating, but that is no longer the case.
Before you go figuring out how to ask a guy on a date, you need to remember that you are just as capable of asking him out, making plans, and following through as any guy is, if not more so. The only thing stopping you from asking him out, is you. So take that to heart, then go in with your plan.
#1 Make sure he is single. If you have more guts than I do, go right into it and just ask him right out. But it lowers your risk for rejection if you get this information prior. Whether you ask his friends or him, be sure he is single so you aren’t stepping on anyone toes.
Also I’m sure you’ve turned a guy’s proposal down before because you were in a relationship and saw the disappointed look on his face. You don’t want that to be you. So try to find this out before asking him out.
#2 Have a date in mind. When you go in saying “Do you want to go out?” you’re leaving that very open ended. They could say yes. If you don’t have a plan in mind, the date may never happen. Go into it with an idea.
If you know you share a love for the same band or are dying to try the new Thai restaurant nearby, work that into the ask out. Say something like, “Are you free Friday night? We should go to that new place down the street.” That gives a more firm plan and less follow up.
#3 Don’t second guess yourself. As women we often apologize for things we shouldn’t and second guess ourselves for no reason at all. If you ask a guy on a date, don’t begin with “I’m not sure if you’ll want to” or end with “It’s okay if you say no.”
This shows you don’t have much faith in yourself, even if you do. So be straight about it. Ask him if he would like to go out and keep it at that.
#4 Look him in the eyes. Eye contact is so important when dating or potentially dating. Nerves can cause you to look down or away from this guy, but making eye contact helps him to feel closer to you.
When you prompt him with your date proposal, look into his eyes, and don’t forget to smile. Whether he saw this coming or if it is a surprise, you’ll be putting him at ease.
#5 Lose the expectations. If you go in expecting him to say yes, you could come across as cocky. You could also have a bad reaction if he says no. But if you go in expecting him to say no you’ll have lower confidence, and he’ll feel that hesitancy.
So lose the expectations. Don’t worry so much about the outcome and what’s going to happen next. Rather focus on the conversation you have right now. Having expectations one way or another is likely to cause disappointment. Go in with an open mind.
#6 Do a smell check. This seems a little shallow, but smells effect us more than you think. Whether you’re asking a guy out at work, gym, or bar double check your breath and your BO.
Pop in a mint if you have garlic breath and spritz some perfume if you have a funky smell going on. Don’t overdo it, but smelling pleasant plays a pretty big role in attraction. Even if he likes you, bad breath could deter him from accepting your invitation.
#7 Be sure it’s a date. If you aren’t careful with your wording when asking a guy out on a date, he could think you’re just asking to hang out. And this can easily be interpreted as platonic, leading to you being friend-zoned.
To ensure that he knows you’re inquiring about a romantic date, try to say something along the lines of “It’s a date.” You don’t want to go out thinking it’s a date and find out halfway through he thought you were just friends. It’s best to be on the same page from the start.
#8 Treat all responses with respect. When you ask a guy on a date, there are many more responses than yes or no. He may say he’s busy, but maybe another time. He could say sure we’ll talk about it, or he can give an excuse because he doesn’t know how to just say no.
But no matter the response try to keep your cool. If he says yes, wonderful. But there is no need to scream. If he says no, keep it simple with “I understand, it was worth a shot.” If you question the response you’ll be uncomfortable and so will he, and no one wants that.
#9 Do not say let’s hang out. I mentioned this earlier. Hanging out can not only be considered a platonic get together, but it also leaves things vague. When you want a date with someone make a plan during the ask out.
Offer to take them to dinner, dancing, hiking, whatever. Just don’t leave it so open ended that you spend weeks nailing down plans and deciding what to do. When it comes to knowing how to ask a guy on a date, there should be a date, not a hangout.
#10 Make sure you keep in touch. Maybe in the 80’s you could make a date and meet there without talking in between, but that is really not an option now. Whether you’re meeting somewhere or he’s picking you up, exchanging numbers is pretty necessary.
This way you are on the same page, and there is less chance for miscommunication come date time.
Every woman should know how to ask a guy on a date. It is not only a useful life skill, but it is a right of passage. Next time you’re crushing on a guy, quit waiting around and ask him yourself.